So I am now a Blogger

So I guess it's official, I am now blogging... I have never done this before, so I can't promise how it will come out. I have all the technological skills of a badger with cataracts and I fully believe that computers were put on this earh for the sole purpose of vexing me and making me feel stupid. In my mind they are bizaare esoteric magical machines that are beyond the scope of my understanding. And I'm not even old, I'm in my mid thirties, one would think that I would have picked up on them just from the sheer proximity of the damned machines.I just got my first cell phone a few years ago, and I looked like a frickin monkey with a typewriter. I was so perplexed by the device, I was convinced that I had to sacrifice a goat or something to get it running.

yes, that is a sacrificed goat

As you have no doubt already noticed, I will be using my own poorly drawn illustrations throughout this blog. Please do not ask if I have hired a toddler to do my drawings, the last thing I want is a diaper filling brat running around my house. And who thought up the word "blogging" anyway, I mean it sounds like it was made up by someone with both autism and that disease Corky had on "Life Goes On". And NO, I am not politically correct, I will make fun of/poke at anyone: minorities, majorities, fat people, skinny people, handicapped people, gay people, straight people, Christains, Catholics, Atheists, nazis, bunnies, me, pregnant women... no one is safe. If I happened to miss whatever group you belong to, don't worry I'll get to to you eventually. If you happen to be one of those thin-skinned assholes who gets offended by the slightest off colored joke, you should go to another blog. Like Mary Mother Theresa's blog if she has one, or the Hello Kitty blog. I dont need e-mails telling me that I'm going to hell; I already know that.


random demons tormenting me in Hell



Now I must give credit where credit is due. The inspiration for this blog comes from Hyperbole and a Half, which was created by a genius of a girl named Allie. My favorite piece by her is Cat Safety Propaganda, I watch it almost every day and it still makes me crack up. Allie, if you happen to read my blog, please e-mail me and give me some tips, I sure can use them. Please check out her blog, I guarantee that you'll be laughing for days.

So again, if anything offends you, go to another blog.